How do I get my oldest son stop picking on everyone in the house?
My oldest son just turned seventeen years old not long ago. He’s in very good shape for his age. He’s a state champion in wrestling and did quite well in swimming and run cross county, and is training for iron man contest. He also already has 9 credits from community college and is at top 50 of his class. So of course he’s very careful about what he eats, how he looks, and everything.
My daughter who is fifteen and my younger son who is twelve is opposite. My daughter and younger son are perfectly happy to stay home, watch television, play video game, and being on the computer. Also they are quite fond of sweet and junk foods which I try to limit.
My oldest son is always picking on them about this. He has complained that my younger son is getting chubby and my daughter is fat, blaming it on their life style. He also is always saying that if I keep this up, one day one of them will be carried out of their house on backhoe because they’re too fat.
Other day when my sister was here to visit us, my daughter was complaining that mosquito bit her a lot. My son hearing this, he replied “yeah may if you didn’t eat so much sweet, they wouldn’t bother you” This is kind of antic he’d pull off almost every time he open his mouth.
A couple months ago when we were on vacation at beach, my son bought a bodyboard to use at the beach which he offered to let my youngest son try. When my younger son didn’t show any interest, my old son throws a fit and blaming it on everybody encouraging the whole family to live a horrible lifestyle and being lazy. He always does this every time my youngest son doesn’t show interest in physical activity or unusual toys.
He’s also always calling them lazy and say television has rot their brain so much that they have no idea how to live. He also always talk to me about how he’s really convinced that television has fried their brain and point out thing such as how they’d not pay attention to their surrounding until commercial or something. I don’t know if he’s being serious or not, but he do it in a such serious manner that it is scary. He has even asked me to throw television out. Sometime he’d screw television up so it doesn’t work then wait for one of them turn on television and laugh as he watch them getting upset and throw fits.
This is making me so mad; I am getting frustrated with his attitude toward his sibling. I and my husband is always yelling at him about this and he’d just laugh and try to lead us into a argument about if other kids are actually leading a good life style. I don’t know what to do any more, I’m at my wits end.
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Tags: daughter, Everyone, house, oldest, picking, seventeen years, son, state champion, Stop, television, unusual toys
4 Responses to “How do I get my oldest son stop picking on everyone in the house?”
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You can’t… It’s a guy thing… They pick on everything smaller then them…
Have your two youngest write him a letter telling him how hurtful his comments are and/or remind him that not everyone shares the same lifestyle and eating habits he does and tell him if he is not careful and starts telling everyone that, that he will not keep and make new friends in the future.
If he is that concerned about their health, he should be encouraging them to join him for a morning run, evening walk, eat healthier.
Not criticizing them.
I don’t know your son very well, but it seems like he has a case of “I’m-better-than-everyone” and “I’m-17-and-I-know-everything.” His constant teasing may stem from something unsatisfactory in HIS life, not necessarily his siblings’. How is his social life? Perhaps his friends or girlfriend has commented on the weight of his siblings, making him embarrassed?
I’m not trying to blame you (the parent), but is there anything in your behavior that might upset him? Do you pay more attention to your younger children than him? He may be trying to get your attention or seek your approval. His outrage at his younger brother not being interested in what he likes may stem from feelings of loneliness, as if no one in the family shares his likes. Also, he may disapprove of your “lazy” lifestyle because he is afraid of being like that as well, hence his constant effort to keep healthy.
I’m not saying that this is THE answer to your problems b/c it could be a number of things, but rather this is just to get the ball rolling toward the solution.
Good luck.
He is very concerned about his siblings’ health and he has his own 17 year old guy way of expressing his concern to you. Maybe you should take his advice, and work with your two younger children about their lifestyle. Still, this gives him no right to tease. But, hey, he’s the older brother, so I wouldn’t worry too much about that because there’s no way of stopping it. Oldest brother picking on younger siblings is not unusual.